05 March 2012

exactly...


mean people leave dents. they really do. and when you're feeling particularly soft, they draw blood.

especially so when you know the person and felt like she knew you.

i feel, of course, so bad about my reply to my hater last week. when pat finally caught up on my blog, he declared it nonsense and said i was better than that.

whoa, mister. that's how i got into trouble in the first place.

anyway. i will try to temper my smugness about my move to a third-world country. i won't relish in the one perk to which i'm most looking forward - a maid - but will instead gleefully anticipate parasites and dengue and a slew of scary insects, rodents, and scaled creatures whose bites have no known antidotes. yay. i could also write about my loneliness and emptiness and difficulty communicating with the ones who will be awake while i'm sleeping. not to mention most of the people around me. that would be funny stuff.

my most paralyzing fear is water, and this new place is going to be surrounded by it. sometimes, this water acts up. but hopefully a tsunami wouldn't happen at the same time a volcano erupts. that would not be serendipity.

would you want my life? not in a million years. but would i ever give it up? not in a million years.

so that's where we are.



actually, no. that's not where we are. a girl left a comment on my sister's story last night and it made me cry. full-on tears.

that's where i am. and that's why i'm here.

gimme. gimme.

16 comments:

Mary said...

Sometimes I read a blog and want to leave a comment but cannot for the life of me think of what I want to say. Just wanted to leave a comment to let you know I'm one of your readers. I like reading your words. I hope the wound caused by your not-so-anon reader heals quickly and that you can get back to focusing on the good stuff in life. I mean really, that's what we should all do, isn't it?

Ana Degenaar said...

So, I had to go a leave my 2 cents on that previous post before I could come back here and tell you how amazing you are. I understand very well where you're coming from and honestly I do keep myself from reading blogs when people are being down-right unrealistic or pessimistic about their own countries and circumstances. Specially because I'm in a place or trying to heal from a lot of bad shit. You know I love your blog like whoa! and I can actually speak like this because I've read all of your posts and that counts for something. Please do not change your perspective. I actually loved the previous post because my Emma loves our maid, she is like part of our family and I find that fantastic. I also live in a place where dengue fever can kill me any time and where every illness is a virus... such as I wicked cold I'm nursing right now.

One thing I know for sure is that people react like that towards people who are unique. Some people cannot stand greatness. I love you and you're great!

Bring on the Indonesia posts!

em said...

I just read the comments & it sounds like someone is just jealous that you get to have a maid.
{I too am jealous but in a way that's got me thinking the boy & i ought to consider his job offer in India so I can have a maid too!} x

mary said...

xo. That's all.

Kelly and Kelly said...

I've not followed the mean comment business. I have my head in the clouds apparently. But someone actually has a problem with you being happy about having a maid? Sounds like those women who have a problem with other women working because it makes them happy. Or with giving your kid a bottle. Or or or. There is always someone who feels she/he his better than everyone else. I hope this person finds someone else to bother.

Richie Designs said...

you are loved and your sisters story? for some reason I reread it last week too. I totally cried again.

I love a good cry.

Anne-Marie @ 10 Rooms said...

I haven't been by in a long while and so have missed all the news. We've moved an awful lot, and it's always hard to make connections, so I feel for you, Karey. As for the haters, it's SO hard not to respond, isn't it? Even when you don't these people take up real estate in our heads.... I wish they would look at their own lives and figure out why they need to spread around their misery... x

ErinEMurray@lovesomeblog said...

Don't usually leave comments, but just a note to tell you that I visit often to see if you've posted. Really enjoy your blog. Met you at Alt Summit year before this one and you were so kind and encouraging. Looking forward to hearing about your upcoming adventure.

beth said...

oh lord....i had to go back to see what comment you were talking about and why....WHY....is it always those with things to say, that the rest of don't even want to read and completely disagree with, that hide behind anonymous ?

besides, you know who loves you. in case you don't, it's the rest of us sitting here with you looking at anon with our necks all bent in odd angle trying to figure out where she came from.

ps...i love naming things and your daughter asking about naming the maid just about made me slide off my couch, as it had suddenly become all slippery with sweetness :)
xo

melissa loves said...

I love that quote...."It lights the whole sky"
Like you, my effervescent friend. I hope you know that your journey to another part of the world will be amazing. It will, cause you are at the helm. Maybe a lot of it will suck, but, that happens there in Virginia too, right? Except no super large bugs with bites with no known antidote. And of course I had to go read the comment left on the post about your sis....ack. Made me cry as well....
I am SO glad you are here.
xoxo
Melis

Krystal Celeste said...

Karey, I don't comment often, but I just wanted to tell you how much I love reading your blog... yours is always one of the first ones I click to. And what I love so much about it is that you have a knack for making everyday life sound magical (I tend to be drawn to bloggers like that), because you know what, it is. Sometimes we just forget that. It makes me smile to read about your life, your family, your adventures.

Do I think just because you share the happy parts of your life with us that it's perfect? No, no ones life is. And to me, it's never sounded like bragging in any way. I admire your desire to really love and appreciate your life, it inspires me to do the same. We should all feel that way about our lives.

There are so many things in life that can bring us down if we let them, why not celebrate the good things? I feel like that's what you do. Please keep writing your beautiful words and funny stories, because I always look forward to reading them! :)

krista said...

ex.
and.
oh.

elodierose said...

I'm all for accentuating the positive. I'm travelling in the US right now (I'm based in Australia usually) and I'll be damned if my facebook isn't going to be a big my-life-is-awesome fest.

Of course I spent three hours in the airport security at Miami, bored out of my mind. And absolutely my hotel in San Francisco was a bit dodgy...and then there was a slightly nasty stalkery incident in New Orleans... but as far as I'm concerned, none of that is as important or note worthy as staying up all night to watch the sunrise over South Beach, or learning to cook soul food, or having a very attractive and fairly famous rapper wink at me in a nightclub.

Of course we're going to talk about the good stuff. Because they people who care are going to be super happy for me. And if my superbitchy ex flatmates find my joy insufferable, then thats entirely there problem.

Your move is exciting. Don't apologise for your excitement. And don't feel like you have to portray a balanced picture of your life. We endure enough mundane, disappointing or crappy stuff day to day and we shouldn't feel obligated to relive it.

Carlyree said...

You are great. That is all.

Natalie said...

I have been away from the blog world for a while now, yet I keep coming back to you. That says something, doesn't it?

I recently ran into a meanie, right on the very street my son's school is on. When it was over and I had held my composure, my son asked what her problem was.

I told him that mean people have something in their lives that is making them unhappy, so they project their unhappiness on others. Because of this, we should actually feel sorry for her instead of angry.

I know it's true because there have been moments in my life where the shoe was on the other foot, and I was angry or hurt or jealous and lashed out at people who didn't deserve it. I am not proud, but I am human.

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