01 March 2012

naming things...

lillie and grae have made the terms skeeve and aggro kind of popular at their school. i imagine many parents and skeeves will be pleased to see them get on a plane.

those aren't words! small people tell them with furrowed brows.

of course they are, they answer smugly. our mom's a writer.

well. not that kind of writer. i just like naming things.




last night, i was helping lillie and esmé fall asleep. they are roomies, with esmé on the bottom bunk so she can stall the midnight killers long enough for lill to make a getaway.

i. know.

i was playing scrabble on my phone, signed in as LiLlIe kATiE, and not really expecting anyone to take me seriously. but one lady started out with a 30-point word and started taunting.

uhhhm?!

waiting?!

you going?!

i kept the girlies up for an extra thirty just so they could see me crush this rude mother trucker with a score of 270-something to a little less than 80 before she exited. this son of a bucket monkey mouth. just...i was just so peeved that i was making up fake swears left and right and all the way around again.

lillie asked if she could use son of a bucket. i wasn't exactly sure. still not sure this morning.




a few days ago, i was cleaning a sink caked with toothpaste, hardened, and a mound of fresh rainbow suds. i growled at esmé and announced that in four months, i would never ever not ever clean a sink again. ever.

how come? she asked.

because we are getting a maid in indonesia. i snapped.

her face. man, it was like heaven was shining on her. she gasped and clapped and suddenly seemed to grow an inch taller with joy.

oh, mommy! what are we gonna name her?!

oh. dear. i guess she likes naming things, too?

gimme gimme.

36 comments:

Ana Degenaar said...

I love your stories. They make my day. My face must be shinning like Esmes face right now. xo

Anonymous said...

Normally I don't like to spread negativity in the blog-world but I HAVE to say something. Sometimes your posts sound so entitled. Entitled, smug, self-righteous. The way you talk about maids and travel...you write as if you and your "girlies three" are Better Than...

There is something even in the moniker "Uncle Sugar" that is actually quite off.

I struggled with whether or not to even comment because I anticipate the response from both you and your readers. (Then don't read! Go away! Karey is precious and smart and should be President!) And I do know how you like naming things; no doubt I will have some horrible names thrown my way. But I wanted to let you know how it sounds sometimes.

Krissy | Paper Schmaper said...

ha. i was going to comment about how cute your story was, then i saw the one above me, and now i have no words. just laughs...

karey m. said...

anon...this was actually a thoughtful comment. i do appreciate it in some ways.

i guess i do feel entitled. i think everyone should feel entitled. i think everyone should feel like their lives and their babes and their husbands are the best. better than, even. otherwise, what the eff are you doing?! "look! just look at the mediocrity i'm cultivating! and i'm psyched about it!" come on. love your life a little more, i say. raise your expectations.

i marvel at my girls because i think they've turned out well but also horribly {!} in spite of me. they come how they come. and that fact always makes me smile.

but if you know me - even if only online - you would know that i feel the same way about others. i feel like we're all just horribly good and doing our best and wishing for things and hoping for more. like travel and maids or great shoes.

the uncle sugar thing was a joke. he promised he wouldn't buy me anything expensive, so when he did, he signed it "uncle sugar." i think he even used a dollar sign. it was funny. off, yes. but funny to me. and it sounded better than pat.

down deep, i still feel like just a girl who grew up on a farm, dirt poor but thrilled. feeling rich in so many ways. that probably won't change, even after your comment.

so why the comment? it sounds a lot like you think you're better than me. or at least less entitled. less smug. less self-righteous. less off.

i'll be honest. i don't like mean people with small thoughts. not in real life and not online. i think you probably do spread negativity and rather enjoy it. i can feel it in your word choices, and the way you seem comfortable commenting in such a manner. it seems effortless.

and the fact that you can't feel the "i'm making fun at myself" tone in my words? makes me feel like we wouldn't share a laugh or a common thought or any opinion.

i'm fine with that.

Heather said...

so funny!! i laughed and laughed, until i came to comment - oh well, can't please everyone. you know i adore you.

Richie Designs said...

hilarious - does she think it will be a pet?
go get em' with WORDS sistah.

Barchbo said...

Skeeve and aggro are both words. The have letters and I know what they mean (and I am an English teacher, so that should settle that!)

And I hope you name your maid Barchbo.

XOXO Keep on keepin' on, lady!

me... said...

well....
you know exactly what i think about that up there.
some people just go through life never "getting it."
their loss

...i read your previous blogs about "naming"
if i were to have another girl (never gonna happen)
matilda christiane

Estelle Hayes said...

Class act, lady.

I vote "Karey for President"!

Torrie said...

i second that vote :).

Mary said...

Well I was going to comment on the post but then of course I read the comments - I'm so glad I always scroll down to see the comments. There is good stuff in posts alone, especially ones written by Karey, but the dialogue in this blog world can be really fascinating. Well done, Karey!

Anonymous said...

methinks anon @ 11:49 was just a little low on sugar because if she only knew that uncle sugar is, like, the best person ever invented she'd be really pissed! and that makes me laugh really hard!!! p.s. i vote estelle hayes for your campaign manager and sound bites. Holla!

Anonymous said...

A truly compassionate attitude toward others does not change even if they behave negatively or hurt you.

karey m. said...

not even my mom would tell you i'm a compassionate person.

come on. stop. this is small. get back to your own blog. shoo.

Mallory Nickels said...

It's very easy to say mean things from behind a black curtain. Darn the internet and its anonymity. It almost encourages people to say things they would never say to a person's face.

Anonymous said...

hahahaha.... neither am I. but I try to be better than.... what I am! (at least temporarily.)

now, let's all get back to working on being happy!

another anon.

Anonymous said...

Well, I'm not at all surprised that this is the reaction.

I guess you only like the truth* when it is for cute images to post on the blog?


*My truth, that is. One reader telling you the truth about what she thinks.

krista said...

perception is a tricky little thing, yes? maybe anon perceives his/her truth as constructive. which is, inherently, a good thing. that said, such critiques seem better suited for emails, yes? opening up a discussion of sorts. posting an anonymous comment to address negativity seems a bit like letting your dog poop on someone's front lawn and leaving it there. and then coming back to see if anyone stepped in it.

miss karey,
my perception is that you have quite a healthy balance of "my life is incredibly blessed & i am a lucky bastard" flecked with a streak of "sometimes i'm an asshole. and so are you. let's talk about it."

gah. i was going to ignore the comment thread. but i totally stepped in it, didn't i? it's all over my shoes.

*fyi - i should totally hook you and my man up on words with friends. he has pushed back a bedtime once or twice working on a word and can't find anyone to play with him anymore...i think you two would battle wonderfully.*

Amy Lynne said...

Your response was perfect. I think you are one cool cat. High five.

Erin said...

Please run for pres. I would totally vote for you!

I wonder how long anon has been following your blog, I would think if she didn't like it she wouldn't read it!

Shannon said...

What does a blog say about you...you love your children (No quotation marks needed), you love your husband and even though i have never personally met you or your man your words allow me to glimpse at a couple that should be so entitled to such beautiful children and lives and loves and loveliness...
Kar, if you run for president please let me know, good candidates are hard to find.
And Thumper...I am sorry anon...get a clue.
By the by, love that E has found her calling to protect in her bed ;)

Tracey said...

Karey, I blame you and your entitlement for my personal mediocrity.

See you next week... Hugs

Richie Designs said...

IP's are trackable - just SAYIN'. not much is anon these days.

karey chin up - boobs out! it's a new day

la la Lovely said...

Son of a bucket what is wrong with people these days?! All I ever feel over in this space is pure love, creativity and darn good writing.

And P to the S - I've met Karey, as in real, life and no one could be nicer!

la la Lovely said...

Son of a bucket what is wrong with people these days?! All I ever feel over in this space is pure love, creativity and darn good writing.

And P to the S - I've met Karey, as in real, life and no one could be nicer!

A-M said...

Wow, it even happens to you? She's sad. How do you feel good about yourself leaving a comment like that? Where's the entitlement? I feel your gratitude... it oozes out of your every word. Mediocrity doesn't light my fire either. Your words dance. You are a brilliant writer. A-M xx

Sherry said...

i actually enjoy the talk of travels and maids and girlies three. i love reading about people with grand lives and exciting adventures. it reminds me to remember to dream big--even on my worst days.

we all have a challenge in life...even if our lives seem perfect. but families who have love, joy, dreams, hugs, and support..really are the richest families around. and karey seems pretty rich with these things :)

i hope she has the fanciest of indonesian houses and at least 4 maids...and i hope she shares the stories with all of us.

Ana Degenaar said...

I used to get this type of comments a lot and I actually started censoring my highest and lowest on my blog but it shouldn't be like that. People need to start understanding that a blog is a very personal space. Like a home... People who write blogs are entitled to their opinions, their likes, dislikes and to say whatever the heck they want. I feel that when I have a problem with something a blogger wrote is probably deeper than that and I might be having a problem with my own circumstances. I've lived in third-world countries for the past 5 years and I know how insanely cheap it is to have a maid. That doesn't mean you are paying the peanuts, it just means your money goes a lot further in that country.
I have a maid and an assistant. Both things I couldn't have in Spain or the U.S. but I live in Brazil and it works for me, I'm happy. I hope you're happy too and I hope you don't see this as a judgment on you character but on the person who wrote this, who cannot even confront you or email you with such intrusive words.

Robin said...

Wow. I never see comments since I finally got an iphone and read all my fav blogs on google reader now. Your post today made me curious so I popped over. I can't believe some people! I love your writing and am sure we would be friends in real life if we ever met. I'll join the chorus..."karey for president!"

Anonymous said...

@lalalovely what a mouth for a "christian-lady".

beth said...

can we all just go back to voting for you for president already :)

i think we got way off track :(

melissa loves said...

sigh......oh, Karey. God, I love you darlin. You take life by the balls & I couldn't agree more my friend. Of course, the idea that you aren't compassionate is just bullshit, as I have met you & I can see it in your eyes. So, just fuggit about it! :) Esme protecting Lil is KILLING. ME. gah, that kid. love. I wish we were neighbors. I wish I was gonna get to spend the day with you again. I wish everyone got you. They are missin out. Damn, you are good with words. Now, give yourself a HUGE hug & kiss from me, ok? Cause I miss you already.
xoxo
Melis

PS "Get back to your own blog. shoo." hee hee
ha ha ho ho hee hee. :)

elodierose said...

The saddest thing here is that she couldn't leave a name, a link back to her most personal thoughts in print.

I'm all for expression, but I believe criticism is pointless if it isn't constructive, and meaningless if it is not well researched. I've been a reader for a long time (quietly) and a single blog post about a maid might sound pretentious, in the context of the rest of your writing, which runs the gambit from heartbreaking and tear jerking to roll on the floor funny, it definately does not.

If she truly believed what she said, she would have left her name. She would have been prepared to be judged just as she judges you, and her own blog would have been held to those same standards she held yours to.

And I bet we would have found a self indulgent rant or smug brag in there somewhere. We all have those on our blogs.

k a t y said...

don't people know yet, if they're going to dual with you, they will never win as long as the weapon of choice is words?

Erin O. said...

Yowsa. This blog is my happy place. I come here when I need a pick-me-up or a picture painted in keystrokes. That is all.

Anonymous said...

Hello, is that a Kay Rosen piece (tell the truth and run)?
A