29 November 2011


i'm so quiet these days, but writing so much more than usual, which is a lot, and none of it's on mackin ink. that feels both funny and as it should be. i seriously need to reinvent this space...i'm thinking that will happen once i move, yes? say yes.

from seriously legal docs to influencing missives to did i really just write that responses to a little mail sent two floors down to my patrick...everything i'm writing these days seems pretty important. like, making little dents in my world important.

i like being a writer. i like being able to write. because on days like this after a few days like that, i see it so clearly: life is all about language, isn't it?

and here i was just telling someone this weekend that i'd love to be a nurse.

grae-rose, however, will someday be a trauma surgeon. that kid is cold as ice. it cracks us up when she offers her medical opinion at the oddest moments. pat fake-earnestly comments "yes. because gracie is a doctor. she's seen every episode of trauma in the ER, you know. plus, 800 pounds and having a baby." as lillie would say, "good lord, gracie" complete with her eye roll. in other news, lillie is charming the pants off me and pat. her english project was one of the most beautiful things i've ever seen...a three-d map of the world with stories about all the places she's seen and lived. it was heart-stopping for me and reinforced why we move around. i always go back to what uncle sugar said when he proposed: "...and we'll have babies and live all over the world so that they understand america's place in it and love her all the more for it." yes to that. and esmé. oh esmé. the other day, i was particularly nice and she looked at me particularly nicely and said "you remind me of your dad." i gasped and said "you never knew my dad." and she smiled with this wisdom and like i knew nothing at all and answered "oh yes i did." these girlies of mine...good lord, right? i want this.


Miss B. said...

I wish I was one of your daughters! I want to travel the world and be loved so much it hurts. When you are ready my dearest of dears you know I am here to help you create a beautiful space on the interwebs, right?


Miss B.

Kate said...

That Esme story gives me goosebumps! Love this!

Carlyree said...

The "you remind me of your dad" story made me cry. It's too beautiful. I'm so happy you were able to document it & better yet, share it here! :)

la la Lovely said...

Wow and wow. Wow to that proposal and wow to Esme saying you remind her of your dad. I think maybe just maybe these babies before they are born into this life are in heaven with our loved ones already gone. I like to believe that they are handpicked for us by those that knew us so well.

And Kathleen said...

Oooh! That ending gave me goosebumps.

krista said...

you had me at joetta maue. seriously, her work makes me feel the same way as your words.
good stuff.
and these kids.
slaying me.