lucky me...

hey, you. i sort of suddenly realized that i haven't told you something sort of important that happened while i was away from you.

it's esmé. she's...amazing. {i would very much like you to pronounce amazing with five syllables or more, please. because she's that good. thank you in advance.}

gone is that esmé who didn't particularly enjoy anyone-other-than-herself. the one who cried all day and all night and spit up white on every piece of black clothing i own at the beginning and end and all through the middle of every across-the-world flight we've ever flown.

gone is that toddler who didn't particularly enjoy my mother-in-law's tone of voice. the one who marched right over to her nona. and apologized to her, you might be thinking. and you would be right. if, by apologized, you meant that esmé kicked her. in my mother-in-law's bad leg, even. but then? then came the apology, you might be thinking. and you would be right. if, by apology, you meant that esmé followed up her kick by throwing a cup of water on her nona.

that esmé is long gone. lucky me.

my esmé now finds double rainbows. gets a kick out of walking all hunched over like an old lady. cleans her room and hops nonstop until we notice. dances a genius robot. runs fast and smiles about how fast she's running. loves to hunt for bugs, but somehow manages to peer-pressure me into catching them for her. even though i am dizzy-afraid of anything smally and crawly, and also even though i am not. her. peer.

she still almost swears. a lot. {any of you - besides richie - remember her huh? what the feck stage? lovely. a tear, running down my cheek.} like, she'll yell what the clucking? and i freeze. gasp. almost start apologizing to the neighbors. almost grab her and almost hissper in her ear you are in major trouble now, old lady!

but then i see the odd little neighbor boy. walking around in an odd little squat. with his odd little head jutting forward. then back. then forward again. with his odd little arms winging it. and my first thought is what an odd little person. my second thought is i wonder if they're moving soon. my third thought is they need to bathe him more. or, just, bathe him. but my fourth thought? probably definitely something very much almost exactly like what the clucking?

i can't say this about many people, but...man...i look forward to every and any moment i can spend with this old lady fairy of mine.

and if she ever saw you? she'd tell you the first most beautiful thing she sees in you. usually something shiny. like your beautiful baubles or your beautiful eyes or your beautiful hair. to esmé, pretty much everything is beautiful. except that odd little neighbor boy.

i got two compliments last night...

one from uncle sugar: she is you.

and one from esmé: your breath smells like crickets and love letters.

lucky me.

i've been wacko-fascinated with flickr since last week. i'll tell you why tomorrow. until then, look at jennipenni's photos. i'm wacko-fascinated with them. and i found her after seeing this brilliant shot that made me laugh for at least ten seconds. try it. that's a long time. but. but. but. she has an etsy shop. which is so brilliant it makes me laugh for at least ten seconds. try it.