hi. it's me again...

for the last five years, i've lived probably-very-far-away-from-you.

i've slept on sand. sunbathed on the red. floated on the dead.

i hired and fired a parade of maids and one very mannish nanny.

i didn't clean. at all. not one toilet. not one tub. not after lillie and grae's weekly what can we make with a bag o' flour plus anything oily and/or wet but mostly oily and - once - honey experiments.

not even after esmé banksy'd an entire room of furniture with one - or closer to twelve - fell swoops of sharpie. red sharpie. there-not-so-happily-ever-after known as the panic-inducing is someone bleeding?! collection. {which, on a side note, was much easier to pass off as a rookie art installation than the who peeped on the couch, esmé?! collection.}

like magic, my messes just - poof! - disappeared.

i didn't cook. at all. or maybe it's more accurate to tell you i didn't cook anything that didn't involve a microwave or marshmallow fluff.

like magic, someone else fed the girlies three and me.

i honestly don't know where my time flew. and although it all made me a bit wiser? it crushes me to tell you that i didn't spend my time wisely.

sure, i found words i thought i'd lost. i created an entire imaginary world with them. but somewhere along the way, i misplaced everything real.

i broke a few important bones i didn't believe would ever heal. they did. surprisingly fast, in fact. way faster than, say, melamine plates or even a broken heart. but that's a story for another time.

i played tennis and got really good. i played wide-eyed american in love with the world, and got even better. because, truly, no matter where i looked, it was as though my lighting was different. everything seemed dipped in glitter. i even dreamed in sequins.

but now? i'm back. probably-not-very-far-away-from-you. i'm home. but terribly homesick. because i miss it. not the maids or the manny or the marshmallow fluff...

no. i miss my magic. my shiny views.

i'm hoping to find it all again here. will you stay with me while i try? say yes...

i am utterly enthralled with this italian dreamboat of a photographer, unsuono, who shot the above stunners. they have absolutely nothing to do with this post, but they have everything to do with my obsessions of late. raw portraits. freckles and wrinkles and amazing eyes and strong hands and soft lips. plus looking at the world differently. is that all? yes. i think that's all. xoxo.