my weekly wrist....

when uncle sugar is away, i wear his watch.

the exchange always goes the same way. he clasps it on my wrist and says don't lose it like he's not talking about the watch. and i wave my hand and say oh, pat...it's insured! and then he says don't lose it like he's actually talking about the watch.

it is a leetle stressful, but far less so than...say...the nightmare i had last night.

we were living in the next place where we're set to live, and the girlies were playing lacrosse catch on the back lawn. all of a sudden, an anaconda slithered into the scene.

{note: this morning, i wiki'd whether or not there are any anacondas in the next place where we're set to live. there are not. however, there are reticulated pythons that can grow as long or longer as anacondas. also, they are faster and more agile. and that news kind of stinks.}

i screamed for the girlies to come. and they turned and looked at me and asked why? or what? i can't remember and both words honestly make my blood turn black.

used to be, i could fake-whistle {i can't whistle. did you know this? so i make this sound like psst-psst. and then my girlies and everyone else in the universe who can't whistle turn and look at me. it's the best i can do.} and the girlies would come running. no questions.

used to be, they told their teachers that, no, in fact there are six senses. the sixth one is the one that tells you when someone's going to kidnap you. now? their sixth sense is a creepy whisper from the top bunk...i see dead people.

used to be, we'd head back to the states for a visit and they'd ask their nona why the heck she was driving with her windows open. someone can throw a bomb in your car, nona! did she not know this? illinois is a dangerous place.

oh dear. i'm trying to think of an ending for this post and i'm all why am i telling these poor things about fake whistles and reticulated pythons?! how did i end up here? i was supposed to walk in, show you my wrist, maybe tell you how i am missing my uncle sugar and how i wear his watch and these ridiculous kukui beads he bought from a gift shop and how someone yesterday asked why i never wear my wedding rings and how i answered ummm. the guy's name is tattooed on my foot. i need the rings, as well?!

oh dear. the end.