13 October 2010

scatterbrained deadlines...

i think this post's title says all i really need to tell you.

i'm smack in the midst of a few assignments, but i wanted to pop in and spill a few words.

my mom is coming to visit us tomorrow and we are crazy-excited. i've painted my toenails indigo. i've eaten very very red meat for the past three days...i think in anticipation of the chill, don't you? i've got to find a minute to tell you about the sweeterie and t.ruffle girls, but i can't find the minute just yet. esmé sings all the time now. mostly, she sings songs about her dolls and how they're going to taser each other. and then she unexpectedly pokes us in the belly. this makes uncle sugar so mad that he starts yelling about THERE'S NO TASERING ALLOWED IN MY HOUSE and when he's really upset HOUDINI DIED BECAUSE SOMEONE TASERED HIM! i don't think that last part is true, nor is the first part, either, because there is definitely tasering happening in his house, still. i bought the sexiest dress, like, ever sold at zara. and it's not black. and someone gave me the sweetest compliment yesterday when she told me you always look so comfortable. so easy. she wondered if it was because i exclusively wore jersey in varying shades of black. i replied that it would certainly explain the comfortable part, but that the easy part was a little too personal. seeing as how we'd only recently met and all.

in other news, i heard the saddest story about little girls who were with their father when he died. the very final minutes. and it brought me straight back to when my own dad died. i remember my very first thought was but who will love me forever now? it was beyond a lonely time, and my stomach still clenches when i revisit it.

anyway. i remember talking to one of my English professors, who was also a priest. long story a little shorter, i can still see myself shaking my head and trying not to cry and asking why those final moments are so...violent. i can't think of another word. i'm sorry.

think about it, he said calmly. the body and the soul have been in love with each other for their entire lifetime. they can't live without each other, but they know they have to part. and it's painful to say goodbye.

ugh. still breaks my heart and pieces it back together all at once. isn't it a reassuring explanation? i thought so, too.

have a sweet day, you. xoxo. photo from capture the castle. i bet people tell her she looks comfortable and easy, too. hee.


ZDub said...

It so beautiful, his explanation. And so very true.

I miss my dad, more and more every single day.


Melissa de la Fuente said...

*sigh* I love comforting explanations....I cling to them, actually. I love this & adore you. I can just imagine that you look very easy & comfortable( yes, easy. I've heard the talk!) ;) and I love that about you. ( and chic of course, always chic)

Richie Designs said...

wow what a beautiful explanation.

Robin said...

that explanation took my breath away...great post (even if you feel scatterbrained)

shannon said...

wow. true and beautifully put, I think that if our body is our true soul mate, how difficult it must be when we must part from that which was carved for our perfect fit.

this post was a little all over the place, but it found itself nicely in the end.

karey m. said...

SHANNON! you just made me snort out my marshmallow! you're SO right. this post was all over the place. i LOVE that you said that.

still giggling.

Brandi said...

those words just sweep me away. it's true i think. it may be the reason why that, try as scientists might, they can't figure out how the body and soul are connected.

Simply Mel said...

I love what Shannon wrote too because it is exactly what I loved about the post ~ a steady stream of random thoughts with a happy ending.

Robin said...

karey, do you remember me and my almost black fireplace? we repainted it...silver. come visit :)

Carla said...

Tucking that explanation away for when I or someone else might need it. So full of truth and life.

leigh said...

wow. thank you for that. what a beautiful explanation.

i wish i knew you in real life... i love the way you think, it's really beautiful.

Elizabeth @claritychaos said...

wow. but who will love me forever now? that just crushed my chest.

just last night my 7yo asked me if I was going to be the only mom he ever has, that he hopes that's how it will be.

I love your blog.

Laurel said...

Oh sweet...this is a lovely bit of truth. I just found you via the darling Louise and I am so happy I did. My oldest two children's father died when they were little and I think you summed it up perfectly and it sounds like you , like my kids, have a Mom who will love them forever more than enough for two.