30 October 2009

swimming. {not drowning.}

she sweetly wrote that it reminded her of me.

huh. i wondered. how did she know i was drowning?

i prefer to believe that my imaginary friend meant these photos reminded her of me because they are stunning. because that's how imaginary friends are, you know.

this morning i did feel a bit like i was drowning. couldn't remember for the life of me if lillie liked strawberry or grape jelly. which really didn't matter in the end because all she wanted was cereal. but before that end? when i asked strawberry or grape? it was like i asked who are you, again? crestfallen is a word i've never used before. until right now. it's really the only word to describe the look on that little thing's face.

and grae. my grae-girl. someday, i have to tell you about her school conference. today, i'll tell you that i walked out of there feeling more pride than i think i've ever felt in my entire life. also more pain, too. that probably doesn't make sense. at all. but i always worry when i see someone hauling around a backpack weighted down with the world. it's way too heavy for anyone. especially for a ten-year old.

and esmé. oh, my. i can't even tell you what she did last night. it will never be in writing. know that it ended with uncle sugar telling her that he should sell her to the gypsies. but he just can't. she's too adorable.

we've got grand plans for the weekend. but i'm more intent on my petite plans. like figuring out exactly and precisely what my lillie katie likes. and lightening my grae-girl's load. and persuading uncle sugar to just rent my mémé to the gypsies. on thursday nights. when she does something so naughty that i can't ever never not even in a whisper tell you. and you know how crap i am with keeping secrets.

there. i feel better now. have i told you how lovely it is to pop in and drop off all of my worries and awkward moments and man i'm a dork stories? well. it is.

thanks for that. and xoxo.

and mrs. french. you know how i feel about you. more importantly, i know how you feel about me. thanks for that. and for elena kalis' photos. and if you don't own a blissful image yet? you should change that, i think. whenever i see our dahlia, i smile. this one is also on my list.


Krissy said...

These sure are beautiful! That Traci is always full of inspiration isn't she?!

Mamma said...

Gypsy here. Looking for a cutie patootie to spend Thursday nights with three crazy gypsy boys. Her naughtiness won't even stand out.

Brandi said...

Such lovely photos and a lovely post too. It's easy now and then to feel like you're drowning a bit, but there's always a way to swim back up to the surface. Hmmm, that's a good lesson for me right now too.

krista said...

sometimes i feel like i'm completely going to suffocate with my feisty 21 month old girl. as though she knows that if she pushes all the right buttons all at once, i will spontaneously combust. then i read stories about your three (!) and i feel better.
wow. that doesn't help you at all, does it?
it's supposed to be a compliment. because you inspire me to listen more and do better.

Kay* said...

these ARE beautiful and do remind me of the images you normally post with your writings. there is something...almost magical and surreal about them..

kathleen said...

is it horrible that all i can fixate on is, "hmm, what could meme have done?!"

don't drown. ok?

mrs. darling said...

today i saw on brown button that you are back and i SQUEALED (out loud. at work.). then i spent the next half hour catching up on you and the girlies three. and drinking in the beautiful pictures. thank you for returning.

Simply Mel said...

When I am drowning in the piles of life, for some reason, I don't look that beautiful?!?

Melissa de la Fuente said...

These are amazing....and I can see why they reminded dear Traci of you. NOT because you seem to be drowning but, because they are beautiful and magical....like you. I am sorry you are having am odd day, here is to you feeling less like a stranger in a strange land soon. (and thank you for your notes....they have made me smile and chuckle, just so you know! :)

A-M said...

I love 'man I'm a dork stories'. That is my life.... daggy, dorky, but.... oh yes, me too.... fiercely protective of my bear cubs. My boys know I will fight anyone who wrongs them... fists and all. Your girls are truly blessed to have you think so deeply about them and their feelings and their growth. You live in the moment and that is truly where happiness resides. A-M xx

Mrs.French said...

Isn't that what being a momma is all about? jumping from one drowning moment to the next? I had no idea...but I wouldn't change one single thing. you have just made the photos even more beautiful...and I didn't think that was possible. xo t

KatieK said...

have just discovered you from Brown Button - wow, you have made me both smile & more astoundingly - laugh. Thank you for your fabulous blog & for sharing some of your life with us. much love, smiles & laughter to you from a new friend............

Richie Designs said...

perfection always here

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