09 May 2011

yes to this...

major weekend. lovely times one billion. minus a few for the birthday cards i allowed the girlies three to choose for their dad. apparently, they are at an age where bums and boobies cards - as esmé affectionately calls them now - rule.

the notes they wrote inside, however, were adorable and made our boy get a little misty. as did my birthday plans for him.

i just backspaced over the words i'm and so and happy and these and days. it's funny how nervous i get about happiness. like someone's going to steal it away from me as soon as i declare my love for it.




i tried to explain this feeling to lillie a few weeks ago...about karma and guilt and worry and superstition and all the other nonsense i know i should throw away one of these days...and she was so out-of-character matter-of-fact in her response. you've no one mean around you that wants to steal your good stuff, she said with a little wave of her hand.

and she's so right. i think i've gotten rid of all those people. finally.

the only people these days that worry me are small. one in particular is quite tiny. and she's making me promise daily that i'll be sure to remember that, for her birthday in september, she wants a really really really good card. one with lots of bums and boobies. i will probably say yes.

last night, we were standing in the front and chatting with neighbors as the sun set. smack in the middle of a funny story, my neighbor stopped, pointed to my doorway behind me, and asked "does
esmé always drink milk straight from the container?"

lillie might be only a little right. there are people around me who want to steal my stuff. off to the grocery to buy milk for my coffee this morning...

i want gray hair so bad, i can taste it.

5 comments:

Ana Degenaar said...

I also get all panicky about happiness being taken away from me by "mean" people but I've gotten to a place in which I can be miserable and happy and the same time. This girly makes the worse times fun.
I'm glad you had a lovely weekend with the girls, Uncle Sugar and bums and boobies cards. Yay!

Simply Mel {Reverie} said...

Uncle Sugar is one lucky man surrounded by such fabulous girlies and YOU!

There is a lump that gathers in my throat each time something great happens, and I just want to close my eyes and let the happiness seep throughout every vein of my body so that no one can take it away and it lasts forever. I think it works...

Richie Designs said...

that's not gray hair that's platinum - totally doable by the way for you...NOT ME.

I was going to tell you the whole story but maybe I'll make it a post - Me trying to be Platinum.

it didn't go very well at all. Dr. visit + a few "sir's" were thrown out in the 3 days I was blonde.

ugh it was bad

Kimberlee said...

perfect post. man how do you do it! - i reckon I have almost gotten rid of the mean people too, its not easy! It has taken me a long time to be happy, think you've reminded me I need to protect it a little better. xx

Brandi {not your average ordinary} said...

sounds like you have so much happiness over there you could almost paint with it. actually, maybe that's your wonderful little secret.

i really do want to grow up and be a mom and woman like you.